Set Your Emotional Thermostat for Happy

This is an essay that I got in my e-mail as part of the flylady e-mails. This message is too good not to share with others. After all the stress and drama that I have gone through in the last few months and people ask how I can continue to be happy and to smile. My secret it is all about how we see ourselves and if we love ourselves enough we allow ourselves to be happy. Please read and enjoy.

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Young@Heart by Pam Young

Set Your Emotional Thermostat for Happy

When I think about the happy people whom I know personally, one of the attributes they seem to have in common is a wonderful outlook on life. It's like they have a happiness thermostat that is programmed for joy and contentment no matter what happens to them.

I thought of this thermostat metaphor because the one in our house has been working overtime with the heat wave we're having in the northwest. We've got it set at 77 degrees and when outside forces (the sun's rays) raise the temperature, the trusty thermostat kicks the air conditioner on to keep our inside lives running comfortably.

Consider an emotional thermostat. Instead of temperatures imagine words on a thermostat with emotions like miserable, overwhelmed, worried, desperate, optimistic, hopeful, happy, and blissful. Unfortunately many have their thermostats set on negative emotions, but we can set our thermostats for happy by deciding to practice being joyful moment by moment regardless of the forces outside of us.

What is interesting about setting an intention of being happy all the time, is when something pulls you from that place you know it and you can kick in and put yourself back on happy. There's no guesswork in knowing your thermostat is off. When you realize it consider these things first, do I need a drink of water? Have I eaten? Did I get enough sleep last night? Usually one of those three deficiencies will affect your emotional thermostat. When those three elements are taken seriously and taken care of, it's easy to keep your emotional thermostat set on happy.

It can sound selfish to consider your happiness as a priority when there are people in your life who think they need you to consider theirs first. I like to call it enlightened selfishness, because when you take care of your emotions first then you are in a position to serve others in joy. If you don't keep yourself healthy you can't be of service to others instead you are dependent them.

I just read Nikki's essay on smiling at yourself in the mirror first thing in the morning and writing a love note to yourself. Smiling at you in the mirror in the morning can set your thermostat for the day and it wouldn't hurt to do it every time you pass a mirror.
In Sidetracked Home Executives: From Pigpen to Paradise one of our rules when Peggy and I got organized was to shower, dress and put on makeup first thing in the morning.

Excerpt: One woman returned to class with this story: "I got up like you said we have to do, and I showered, shampooed my hair, and put my makeup on. I felt wonderful? I went to wake up my teenage son, and he said, 'Aw, Mom, you slept in your clothes!'"

Actually, it was even a bit of a shock to us to pass ourselves in a mirror and catch a glimpse of a stranger in our house. We began complimenting ourselves for looking so nice. "Oh, now don't you look pretty!" We felt a little strange at first, giving complements to an image in the mirror, but we decided we needed some positive stokes. Was it egotistical to tell ourselves how well we were doing? NO! We decided that, if egotistical people would take some time to tell themselves they were "all right," maybe they wouldn't' have to tell everybody else.

Abraham Lincoln said: "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be." He also said, "Everybody likes a compliment."

Now I'm going to go write that love note.